sch starts.....

sch finally start for mi....kind of stress up....coz decided to work hard for this year liao after de 1st year result came out...n taking 6 subjects for 2nd year for mi will be quite fierce for mi...kind of sian...coz got to see her on wed...whole day....so sian....sometimes becoz of her...i cant be with my friends...cant be as close with my friends when she is around....i realised..i dun realli hate her...i am sometimes annoy with her speech n action n stuff....since i dun treat her as close friends...there r stuff i might pick on....

in de past i was dependent on her...but now i dun wan to depend on her at all...dun wan her help or anything...de more she wan to put her nose in...nowadays work become less...no $$...she noes n when we share food n stuff she will offer to treat....this i dun like..i hav no $$ but i hav no wish to owe ppl $$...so i will return de $ when i see her....if she feels tat she is rich enuff...there are other poor ppl ard...can giv as charity...$$ dun buy u true friendship....super dun like to owe ppl stuff especially to her....i would reject all offers from her...like studying together...in some ways i juz dun see to eye...de more persistent she is...de more irritated i will be....i dun wan means i dun wan...respect my choice...

i guess going along with ppl decision is wat i always do coz i dun like making decisions....but tat does not mean tat i dun hav my own point of view n thinking...true sometimes i realli hav no idea...but if de decision is acceptable i will juz go along...but my inner self has its own thinking....since i am no longer close as her...terms like 'sis' is a bit sensitive...though its juz a term...but it has meaning....'sis'...to mi means tat u hav to be close enuff to hav use this term....but since its her one sided view....i totally dun like to see this term....it seems to be copying from de jie meis friends i made...becoz we hav formed de jie meis grp....she wans to follow....to get close to mi...but like i say....dun assume ur thinking on others....other may not think as u do....u r not always right...u r not always de person influencing others....watever u do...does not concern abt mi....i respect ur own decision...so do wat u wan but dun affect mi or my friends...pls draw de lines n stand where u stand...

well..no 1 is perfect...so do i....i try to be good to all my close friends...but if u ever cross de line its harder for mi to forget...avoidance contact with this kind of friends will be de treatment....i cant find any reasons to forgive...so i choose to put aside....when i come to de point where i wish to hav no contact at all...it is harder to be friends....i wont allow myself to get hurt for ppl's selfish means...i am no idiot...but sometimes i still find trouble for myself...which is a idiot doing...how i wish i could be selfish n unfeeling so i can juz cut off any relations who hurt mi....i got urge...but i am not harsh enuff....